FROM MY HEART 2

From my Heart 2

I knew something was wrong,

The way he looked at me was different;

I ignored it,

Like I do everything else that I don’t understand.

As I stand in my wedding dress;

Being left alone at the altar,

I understand…

That look that I ignored,

The all too familiar look,

It was how my father looked at me;

Like he hated me.

 

I thought I had found the one,

The person who would love me even through my odds;

Not surprising I was wrong,

I was never one to figure out what people meant by hurt;

Right now, in this hall…

My chest tightens and for the first time,

I feel a pain in my heart,

It cuts deep,

Deeper than anything I have felt;

Even deeper than my fondness for him.

 

I scan the hall,

Filled with pity looks and some of it mockery;

His family burdened with guilt,

Based on their ability to not look at me;

I grin and I think it comes out as a wince,

Judging by the tears in his sister’s eyes;

I smirk and pull myself together.

It’s alright,

I take off my veil and grin widely,

There is so much to eat and drink;

Please help yourself,

I just have to change out of this dress in white.

I say to the crowd.

 

The silence that greets me is deafening,

I pretend not to be affected;

I change to a jean and a big shirt,

I sit beside the cake with my plate filled with delicacies;

I ignore the glances from his parents,

I understand that they don’t know how to react;

If I had cried,

At least, they would be able to comfort me;

I won’t give him that satisfaction,

I might not know a lot about expressions of love,

But I know plenty about hate and revenge;

He thinks he has the final say?

From my heart,

I assure him with a promise;

This is far from over.